A monk in Mongolia changed my channel. I was studying abroad in college, and he had been sent by his teachers, at the request of the Dalai Lama, to help guide the reemergence of the dharma after generations of communist repression.
Venerable Thubten Gyatso introduced me to the concept of bodhicitta, or awakened mind. He not only taught the concept, he embodied it. He showed by his example the subtle and profound meaning of opening your heart and deeply empathizing with others.
His teachings on compassion have profoundly affected me and helped me understand the possibility of shifting my allegiance from “me” to “we.” Thinking about how others suffer leads me to expand my caring beyond the confines of my own personal experience and my limited number of family and friends.
The more I contemplate, the more empathy I discover. I have felt moved to act. This is not simply pity nor is it “idiot compassion”—just giving people what they want regardless of the outcome. Mentally putting people in my precious place, or higher, has opened my mind and activated the felt experience of interdependence.
Compassion for all beings includes and starts with ourselves. We acknowledge our own suffering honestly and objectively, but don’t identify with it. We relax, breathe, and let it go. We recognize that all beings are suffering in their own ways. There is a spectrum of diversity in the particulars, but the feeling of suffering is shared universally. Based on relating with our own suffering and liberating it, we can start to do so with others’ by aspiring that they too be free from any anxiety and torment.
Since we are all connected, every action and aspiration makes a difference. When we regard others’ happiness to be as important as our own, our kindness and awareness naturally grow. From this empathy, we not only are inspired to consider others as valuable, but are moved to act to help them. And we don’t have to go to Mongolia to practice this! We can do it in our own home, town, state, and country.
We are all truly in this together.
Contemplation Exercise
- To start your session, find a quiet space. Set a positive intention.
- Do a few minutes of calm abiding meditation, and then slowly recite three times: “May all sentient beings be free from suffering and the root of suffering.” (Memorizing it is encouraged.)
- One classical image for this contemplation is a mother without arms whose only child has been swept away by a river. Imagine yourself as the mother. Notice how that feels. Return to the recitation, and expand your sphere of empathy from yourself to those you already care for, then to those you don’t know, and even to people you don’t like or who have harmed you. Include those seen and unseen, all beings.
- Conclude with a few minutes of calm abiding meditation. Offer any goodness from the session to others.
Nick Vail is a second-generation Buddhist who lives in Seattle. A single parent, he enjoys quality time with his son, playing the guitar, singing, dancing, and meditation.
